better with time

[shayne veronica brennan]

_{this post is tagged for alister james deville . it is dunzo and has idk! words. the one and only the ready set contributed to this inspiration from the song love like whoa . this template was created by the amazing amber you steal it and there will be an angry baby who will eat your brains no joke. additional notes they are so sad}
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People always told shayne that these things got better with time, but how was anyone supposed to know that. It wasn't like they could bat their eyes and blink and pain that was constantly in her heart would go away. Jack had been a major part of her life and that was saying something because she did not let men in her world. No one ever seemed to care about her, except to get in her pants. It was hard enough on the brunette, but she could not even begin to fathom the pain that his little brother Alister was going through. Jack was a hero, someone who fought bravely for their country. He never thought that this would happen, how could he? He had told Shayne that everything would be okay, and made the same promise to everyone else in his life. Things happened, and now everyone was forced to pick up the pieces of their lives in their own ways. Shayne focused on work, but that was only part of her day. The other half was spent cooped up in her apartment wallowing in her own sorrow.

Shayne never wanted to involve anyone else in her pitty part because let's face it she was alone on this one. Maybe that was what had promted the brunette to see if Alister had been online that afternoon. The two of them were going through grief just the same, for a brother and a lover, and they were the only people that really understood how the other felt. She just wanted the hurt to let up for both of them because right now it felt like a weight was constantly on her chest. Most of the time whenever she was in the hospital it felt like her world was crashing down around her. Jack knew how important it was for her to save lives, and being a nurse she was going to do that. Now the one life she wanted more than anything was his. She wished above everything else that she could have been able to save him. It was no where near her power to do so since they had all been informed of his death. But he was a war hero now. Something she would be able to tell everyone for the rest of her life.

Shayne could not have been more thankful for her teachers giving her some lienency with her grades and giving her time to get her act together. She studied hard but she just kept to drinking her tequila and shutting the world out. For some reason though she was able to invite over Alister and hope that the collective company could pull them both out of whatever funk they were both in. She had decided it was time to clean up the apartment a little bit before he showed up anyways. There were bottles of tequila everywhere and her chinese cartons. Vidette had been over trying to cheer her up but nothing was working. So instead there were always shots of tequila taken and the problems pushed from their minds. It was how she liked it especially since both girls had things to wallow about. But shayne tiedied up her apartment and then decided she was going to have to change her clothes and do something with her short hair. Shayne was not normally the girl who wore her hair short but for some reason something Jack had said made her cut it all off. So she showered quickly and threw on a pair of jeans and a shirt. She really was not paying that much attention as she dressed herself but at least she matched a little.

She was looking at the clock trying to remember what time he said he would be there, and that was when the door bell rang. She bounced down the stairs and to the front door. She opened it and tried to smile whwnever she saw Alister standing in the doorway. Shayne let him in with ease and was glad that he had come over. "so how was classes? I figured you would have been able to get some make up work and what not. But didn't you say you wanted to shower, or would you rather just go on a drinking binge now and shower later?" she raised an eyebrow at him and led the way to the kitchen pulling out bottles of all kinds of liquor. Shayne kept at least two bottles of tequila, a vodka, and a whiskey in her house at any given time. It just was a known fact that she was a tequila drinker. "well where do you want to start?" she smirked and then turned to get the shot glasses down from the cubboard. She was just thankful to be getting to do something that was almost fun.

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[alister]

Everyone had told Alister that it would be okay. They'd offered words of encouragement and reassurance that life would go on without Jack, but things weren't that simple. Words weren't going to fill the void that his brother had left in him when he'd died. Alister would never be able to move on from not having Jack in his life. He'd loved his older brother too much. Having him ripped away from Alister's life wasn't something he would ever just get over. Jack had been his hero, and despite his protests, had decided to go and be their country's hero too. Every day that Alister hadn't heard from him, he'd feared the worst until the day the news had come that the worst had happened.

Alister would never forget the day he'd found out his brother had died in battle. He'd been studying for a final at home when the door bell had rang. The young man had set his book down and rushed down the stairs, thinking that it was probably just someone to see his mom or dad or maybe a package, but instead when he opened the door, he was greeted by the sight of two men in uniform. Neither of them were his brother. Alister only knew one reason why they would come here. Jack was dead. He stood there numb as they introduced themselves before they actually spoke the words. They threw in words like honor and courage and bravery, but it all boiled down to the same thing. His brother would never be coming home.

Alister saw his mother appear behind him and tears fill her eyes, but the sight of her was like a trigger. He took off running from the house as fast as he could, unsure of where he was going. He ran and ran until he was in the forest, far away from anyone or anything, before he tripped on a root and fell into a pile of leaves. It was then that he was finally aware that he was sobbing, the choked noises seeming to be coming from far away. Alister could only lay there helpless, his tears not stopping until he finally passed out. He wasn't sure how much time had passed before he woke up, but when he did, it was dark and there were voices and beams of light shining through the woods. Someone was coming for him.

He couldn't recall later who exactly found him or how he'd gotten back home, but when he woke up again, it was morning and he was in his bed. It took only a matter of seconds for him to remember that Jack was dead and for the tears to come again. He had no idea at the time just how many more days he would spend in bed crying like that. A few days later, they had Jack's funeral. There were lots of apologies and a blur of faces, but he couldn't accept any of it as reality. The second the funeral was over, Alister went back to his bed. By the time he was able to pull himself together enough to see how everyone else was handling things, everything had only gotten worse. His mother had become an alcoholic and his father never talked anymore. Alister was simply all alone in the world now.

Time passed like it always does though. The world kept moving and eventually he got back into a normal routine. Simple at first: get up, shower, brush teeth, eat, school, eat, go to bed. Each task seemed to take all his effort, but he slowly got better at it. When he was finally able to go back to a semblance of his old life, it wasn't the same. Alister started to drink and sleep around and do all the things that he knew he shouldn't because they kept his mind off of the pain he still felt in his chest. Slowly, those things became normal for him, and he started to get a reputation. Well, that was until he met Emily.

She had no idea, but his feelings for Emily were the first real ones of happiness and caring that he'd had in over a year. There was something about her that made him feel like he might be able to be normal again, if only she were there to help him stay that way. Still, tonight wasn't about Emily. It was about Shayne, Jack's girlfriend before he died. Alister hadn't seen her much since the funeral. He hadn't really wanted to truthfully because she reminded him of Jack. Things were starting to change though now, and Alister had always liked Shayne. He'd even had a little crush on her when she and Jack had started dating. So he thought that he could at least spend some time with her after going so long without seeing her.

They'd agreed to meet after he finished classes and she'd said he could shower at her place, so he'd packed a change of clothes in his backpack. As soon as he got out of his night class, Alister had driven over to the address Shayne had given him. He hadn't seen her in months, so it made him wonder a little what she looked like now. Probably just as beautiful as always. When he got there, Alister parked his car in the driveway and went up to the door with his backpack slung over his shoulder. A minute later, it opened and there stood Shayne. He'd been right. She was still gorgeous. He gave her a half-smile as he walked into her apartment, before she asked how his classes were and whether he wanted to drink or shower first.

Alister could tell that she was trying a little too hard to be bubbly and happy, probably for his sake, and he figured he would play along. It couldn't hurt considering everything. He set his backpack down by the door and watched her move to the kitchen before following her and then replying, "Classes are good. I was behind for awhile...but my teachers were understanding about letting me make up some of the work." He stuck his hands in the pockets of his jeans before continuing, "Anyway, I think I need a few drinks first...I've missed him a lot lately. The shower can wait...and thanks for inviting me over, Shayne. I know we both could use the company, and I've kind of missed having you around." With that, he gave a tiny shrug and waited for her to start pouring the drinks. Maybe getting drunk again would stop him from wishing quite terribly that Jack was there with them at the moment.

[shayne veronica brennan]

_{this post is tagged for alister james deville . it is dunzo and has one thousand one hundred and sixty five words. the one and only the ready set contributed to this inspiration from the song love like whoa . this template was created by the amazing amber you steal it and there will be an angry baby who will eat your brains no joke. additional notes wow that was longer than expected XD}
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Every day was trivial whenever Shayne really thought about it. It was so hard to think that life was ever going to get better, and that was because the only person who had made a difference was gone. Her hero was gone, and it was not just her that was affected. Jack’s little brother Alister had taken it hard, so had the rest of the family, so she was not surprised that she had basically been pushed aside and forgotten about. Shayne knew that it was going to be hard to adjust to life after him, and it was hard to breath some days. Jack had a part of her heart that would never be replaced because he was gone. How was she supposed to move on with her life whenever part of her was going to be with her fallen hero. She knew that his family was not doing so great, but it was not her place to put her face where it did not belong. Shayne just wanted to know how everyone was doing, because she was alone in this place. Arietta had been her home for a while, but it was not like she grew up here. It wasn’t like she was friends with a lot of people. She had Vidette but that was about it, and she had Alister whenever he was not in his own dark hole.

The funeral had come and gone, and she had tried to hold back all of the emotion that was breaking through her. She was a mess that was constantly crying and could not bring herself out of her own dark hole. She had been a mess for too long, and trying to pull herself out of the funk was harder with her clinical coming up. She was a nurse, and it was not like she could really pull herself out and deal with death and dying. This was why she pushed herself harder to make it through her classes. Jack needed saving, and she was not there to save him. Someone else had held his life in their hands, and it slip through like sand. Shayne was not about to do that with someone else that came through the emergency room in her car. She was going to fight like hell to save them and make Jack proud. She was going to get back into the swing of things, even if it took everything in the petite’s brunette power to do so. She knew that Jack would not want her to wallow too long, so little by little the brunette was pulling herself back together. She tried to keep up with Alister and the rest of the family, but she knew that it was just hard for them to think about her being around. She let herself drift further away from the only people besides Vidette, that she had really been close too. She slipped through the cracks and just busied herself in the work at the hospital and non-committed relationships.

That is what had caused the dramatics of Kaler Scott in her life. After everything had happened with Jack, she had finally made time and space in her life for someone in her life and it back fired. She had opened herself up and actually let a man get somewhat close to her only to be taken advantage. She had not wanted to sleep with Kaler off the bat and he had not pressured her. It had been something worth while to her, until she caught him behind the bar with Vidette. Her absolute best friend in the world was sleeping with someone that she thought had been her boyfriend. It had almost ruined the girls’ friendship, but that was not the worst of the situation. The worst was confronting the bastard about what he had done to her; that had been the worst mistake of the young brunette’s life, and it had almost cost her that exactly. She had clawed at him hoping to have him release her from his grasp, but no instead she walked around the town with bruises around her neck trying to explain what happened. Kaler’s temper had gotten the better of him and she was the walking proof. It was then that she missed Jack even more than she had ever missed him. He would have never treated her like that, and she did not understand how someone could do that, no matter how angry they were. It terrified her to know that this possibility was there, but she had been doing pretty damn fantastic at avoiding him. She never went to the bar that he worked at and avoided his usual haunts like it was the plague. Shayne was not the girl to get involved again after this.

It was because of Kaler that she was missing Jack even more and the whole reason that she had decided to talk to Alister. She was expecting him after classes, and that was when the door opened and their night was about to begin. Shayne hated acting sad, because she had done that for too long. She was sad over Jack, she was sad over her life, she was sad over a lot of things. That was why she had invited him over that night, she needed someone to understand exactly what she was going through. Her life had crumbled, and now she was trying to pull some semblance of it back together. She tried to keep herself upbeat and happy like she used to be, but she knew that Alister would see through her act. He always did, so she pulled the alcohol down and the shot glasses too as she listened to him talk about his day. “Yeah, mine were pretty cool about letting me make up the work. It’s been rough with clinicals starting soon, but you know me.” She listened as he spoke, and she poured the shots of tequila to start. Shayne was a tequila drinker, and that was always in her house. If it wasn’t hell froze over. “It was my pleasure to have you over. I’ve missed him too. It seems like when I make any kind of progress, I end up taking five giant steps back.” she let the tequila slid down her throat with ease. She tried to smile, but it was harder than she thought. “You know, I missed having you around too. It just doesn’t feel the same without you in my life. Especially since he isn’t around anymore. I know I kind of remind everyone of him, so I understand you not wanting me around.” She shrugged and poured another shot and did the proper shot with salt and the likes. Not that she really needed it since the girl was a born tequila drinker. Maybe the alcohol would loosen her up and not make it feel like her heart is breaking.

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